Insights into Editing: A Conversation with Carin Siegfried Part III

Today Carin Siegfried, an independent editor in Charlotte, continues to share common editing problems which she finds in manuscripts. See last week's blog for her previous comments on the problems she frequently encounters. 

•   Passive voice:  It slows action down and you want action in your book. In case you’re unfamiliar, passive voice is using any version of the verb “to be” including are, am, being, was, is, be, become, etc.  Sometimes it is the only real option, but that’s the case less than 25% of the time. It’s boring and, well, passive. Even when it doesn’t feel like you’re adding action– changing “is” to “seems” for example – still unconsciously registers with readers as less passive.  It’s actually a good exercise for you to go through and see how many passive verbs you have used as it will make you think more carefully about word choice. 
•   Flat characters: Think of Sex and the City.  Miranda, Samantha, and Charlotte all have very distinctive and easy to pin down personalities whereas Carrie does not.  She’s a writer and likes fashion, but neither of those are personality traits as much as one is what she does and the other is what she likes. But it’s very easy to say that Miranda is driven and judgmental and passionate, and Samantha is sexy and independent and impulsive, and Charlotte is traditional and caring and open.  Ancillary characters are easier to give more personality because, as they are not the main character, they are easier to see from a distance. But you need to have that distance to see your main character and give her more oomph. This is a common issue when the main character is a stand-in for the author. While Sex in the City proves this can work, the success of Sex in the City is more despite Carrie’s lack of character than due to it. 
•  Author proxy. When the main character is an author-proxy, it's nearly impossible to see her clearly like an outsider would, and because you (of course) know your own personality traits inside and out, it's not always obvious to you when those aren't expressed clearly.  Characters that are closer to "types" are much easier for readers to understand and see clearly right away, and while you might think that "types" are the last thing that you want, in the course of your story you will show us that they're three dimensional.  So we start with a well-defined outline and then it's shaded in. But with a fuzzily defined main character, she stays fuzzy.  She's never been well-defined and so adding shades of grey to her as we go along doesn't make her character become more distinct. It’s best if a main-character isn’t a lightly veiled version of you.

This information is from Carin's presentation to my CPCC class on Writing Fiction. 

Insights into Editing: A Conversation with Carin Siegfried Part II

In today's blog,  Carin Siegfried, an independent editor in Charlotte, NC, will begin answering the question, "What are some common editing problems?" Since she has much to share (and apparently the writing community makes many mistakes!) two more blogs will follow with additional editorial issues. This material comes from her presentation to my Fiction Writing class at CPCC.

• Overuse of italics (and all caps) for emphasis. Italics really ought to be used sparingly if at all.  Your language should be enough to convey the tone without resorting to those crutches. And italics can be extra confusing as you do need them when you use them for the titles of magazines and books, for foreign language words and phrases, or to clarify something magical. If you can lose italics and not lose the intent, then lose the italics. 
• Overuse of ellipses and dashes. They also get distracting when they are overused. Use them when necessary to convey tone and urgency, but they lose their effectiveness if they are diluted.
• Colloquial speech/slang. It can also be distracting and unnecessary. Accents often seem to come and go – it’s very hard to stay consistent. You also run the risk of misusing words or phrases if they aren’t natural to use – such as when a Yankee tries to use “y’all” for a Southerner, they often use it completely wrong (such as when speaking to a single person).
•  Anachronisms. Keep in mind the era you’re writing about, be careful not to inject in 2012 things from your own youth, such as a love of Star Trek, or answering machines. And don’t cheat and set your story in the 1990s or 1980s. You should always set your story now, unless you have a compelling reason for putting it in the past (and “because it’s easy” isn’t a compelling reason.)
•  POV. Be very careful. For instance, if your book is told in first-person or limited third-person (which means the readers only know what your main character knows) you can never tell us what another character is thinking or feeling. You can't change the point of view in the middle! Omniscient third-person is very tricky and probably should only be attempted by masters, such as Larry McMurtry’s use of it in Lonesome Dove. 
• Reduce adverb use. This is a current bugaboo in the industry, I think largely thanks to Stephen King’s fantastic On Writing. I, however, disagree that they should all be hunted down and killed, as I find adverbs quite useful, but one should be careful not to over rely on them.

Click here for the first blog in this series in which Carin shared the different types of editing.