Showing posts with label Cherry. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Cherry. Show all posts

Monday, November 6, 2017

Shared WIP Tag III- The Story World

Congratulations to Joan Edwards who won RESTART from last week's giveaway.

Thanks to almost five hundred people who read my second blog in this mini-series of posts about my WIP. That's a new record for a blog post about Half-Truths! In this post, Julian Daventry (the ring leader for these posts) challenged me and my fellow bloggers with ten more thought-provoking questions. Click here for Part I in this series, and Part II.


1. Name a unique aspect of your story world.

Both neighborhoods, Myers Park where Kate Dinsmore lives with her grandparents, and Cherry, an African American neighborhood where Lillian Harris lives three miles away, still exist.  Several years ago I met a gentleman who grew up in Myers Park. Although his grandparents’ home is now subdivided into condominiums, we walked through parts of it. I have used it as a model for the Dinsmore home--including the gardens and the barn out back that once stabled horses. 


George Snyder pointing out the "LS" (his grandfather's initials)
carved into the shutters on his grandparents' home. 

One of my other experts was an elderly gentleman who grew up in Cherry. One day he drove me around the neighborhood and showed me his church and the home he grew up in. 

Price Davis outside his childhood home in Cherry.


2. Talk about one of the important animals in the story (someone's pet or horse; or a fierce animal the MC must defeat).

When Kate leaves eastern, NC to live with her wealthy grandparents, she brings along her goat, Eileen. In a lot of ways Eileen represents Kate’s past that she doesn’t want to let go of. But, Eileen is stubborn and rambunctious and in some ways she represents Kate’s future too. (I’m not going to explain that. You’ll have to read the book to find out more!)

This is research.

3. A paragraph describing something in your storyworld (building, landmark, etc.).

Occasionally, Kate writes poems. In this scene Kate is walking back to her grandmother’s house after secretly meeting Lillian in Cherry. (Crossroads is the fictional town where Kate grew up.)

In Crossroads, nights were soft blankets
stars, my friends.
In the city, harsh street lamps glare,
Giant shadows loom behind every tree.
Footsteps echo.
Is someone following me?

Run across Kings Road.
Safe in Myers Park now.
Breathe.
Goosebumps prick my skin.
Monster mansions line the road.
Quiet. Solemn. 
They don’t care about a country gal
rushing past.
I belong here,
right? 
Not in Cherry.
Where Negros live.

4. Something dangerous in your story world.

This is part of a scene when Kate and Lillian go downtown together.

Over the lunch counter the WHITES ONLY sign accuses me. I stare at the chalkboard menu next to the large mirror. Will the waitress serve Lillian? She should! Lillian’s sand-colored skin is almost as white as mine! Now I understand why she’s wearing a suit. With less of her skin showing, she’ll blend in better.
      The waitress takes our order without giving either of us a second glance. I spin my stool, trying to relax.  The police officer who had shoved past us when we were standing outside Liggett’s swaggers past the colored kids. He stops, twirls his nightstick, and says something I can’t hear. Whatever he says, the kids nod their heads obediently. But when he turns his back, a boy sticks his tongue out. The kids hold their hands up to their mouths as if holding in laughter.
      I twirl back and look at our reflection in the mirror. Lillian is sipping her Coca Cola like she’s savoring every ounce. “Don’t look now, but that fat policeman we saw outside just walked in,” I whisper. “Pretend like you’re minding your own business. Maybe he won’t see us.”
     “I AM minding my own business,” Lillian hisses back. 
     “Hey there, Officer Duckworth,” the waitress calls. “Want your usual?”
     “Yes, Susie. Two hot dogs all the way!” he looks up and down the counter. “You’re mighty crowded here today. There ain’t a place for a hard-working officer of the law to rest his aching feet.”
     “It’s the special,” Susie jots down his order on her pad. “Brings everyone in off the street.” She jerks her finger towards the colored kids and wrinkles her nose. “‘Specially them.”
     “They shouldn’t give you no trouble,” Officer Duckworth says. “If they do, you just let me and my partner here handle it.” He taps his nightstick that’s hanging from his hip.
      Officer Duckworth strolls along the row of stools, greeting some of the customers, and patting a few on the back. He’s heading right for us! What are we going to do if he figures out Lillian is colored? We’ll be arrested and dragged off to jail! I can’t believe Lillian’s put us in such danger. When Grandmother finds out what we’ve done, I’ll never be allowed out of the house again.
     Lillian’s eyes meet mine in the mirror. Outside of a vein pulsing in her neck, her face is as calm as the fish pond behind Pop’s house. She pats my hand. “My Daddy always says, ‘Nothing ventured, nothing gained!’”   
     I grit my teeth. More than anything I want to be mad at her, but I can’t. 
     Her passing was my idea.

5. Something delightful in your story world.

Remember the marble in Post II? Kate's grandfather gives one to her one to and Lillian. Uncomfortable with receiving a gift from her white employer, Lillian tries to give it back:


“Nonsense! I have more than I can ever play with.” He laughs and shakes his head. “Besides, who’s going to tell me that an old man can’t give trinkets to two pretty young women?” 
 He slides the marble drawer closed. “It’ll be our secret,” he says. Then he sits down and picks up his paper. I toss my marble from one hand to another. Do I want to share a secret with Lillian? 
Thunder rattles the window. Suddenly, the library door slams open. As if string ties our hands together, Lillian and I pocket our marbles at the same time. 

6. A movie soundtrack that would complement the setting.
I have no idea. But here's a song Kate likes to dance to:
More Research


7. How does the geography impact the story?

The physical landscape doesn’t play much of a part, but this is a uniquely southern story. I recently explained the premise to an older friend in Grand Rapids, MI. Her response made me realize that the politics and history of the South—although studied in other parts of the country—may shock readers who have not lived in the South.

8. Is there a particular location or time period your story you had in mind when creating your story world?

North Carolina, 1952. As a result, I've read about the Korean War, McCarthyism, tobacco farms, fashion, cars, architecture...you name it. See my Pinterest boards for pictures!

9. What is the climate like, and does it play a role in the story?
It's hot and humid in the summers, but that doesn't play a huge role. I've realized that I probably have included too many storms though...

10. Are there any traditions, and do they have an effect upon the plot? 

I can't think of any!
********


I hope you'll check out my fellow bloggers answers and see how they answered these questions.




Monday, December 26, 2016

Marking a Milestone

Last week I pressed send.
Not to an agent or an editor. 

But to 10 beta readers. 

I finally have a draft of Half-Truths, which is ready to be critiqued!

Eight years ago Joyce Hostetter challenged me to join her in NaNoWriMo. I'd been thinking about writing a novel and had a rough idea what it was going to be about, but unlike my student Sydney Kirsch, I was unprepared. 

Undaunted, I plunged in. Eventually what I wrote in November, 2008 turned into Draft #1 of Half-Truths. It was from Kate's POV and I thought it was terrific.

I wrote slowly back then. Labored over word choices.  Experimented with tenses and had A LOT of false starts as I couldn't figure out where to begin the story. I edited as I went. Did I say slowly? I finished that draft on New Year's Eve 2010. I spent the next eight months honing and perfecting and thought it was "done." (How naive could I have been?)

I attended the 2011 SCBWI-Carolinas conference and was blown away. My work was critiqued by Mary Cate Castellani who suggested I write the novel from two points of view. Re-vision began and Draft #2 was born.
My first attempt at outlining chapters
from alternating POV. Index cards circle
my dining room table.
During that time I read books about the experience of being bi-racial, books about Charlotte, and interviewed experts. For more on these books and my interviews click on the Half-Truths tab. 
One of my favorite experts. Price Davis, constantly reminded me to make my story authentic.
He's standing in front of his childhood home in Cherry, NC where my character, Lillie lives.
Price passed away in December, 2016. 
The second draft turned out to be my kitchen sink draft. I wanted to put in everything that I found. How African American funeral homes used hearses for ambulances because the white ambulances wouldn't transport blacks. The poor care blacks received at Good Samaritan Hospital. Police brutality. The one drop rule

I sent Rebecca Petruck that draft in July, 2013. (The scene I shared in that blog post is still in my story, but stronger.) 

After receiving Rebecca's editorial input, Draft #3 was conceived in August, 2013. I worked on character arcs, rearranged plot points, and eliminated some of the extraneous events. 

Draft #4 deepened the characters. But I strayed from my pitch which, I had written in 2012: 

"In Charlotte in 1950, two teenage girls--one black and one white-- break racial restrictions, uncover family secrets, and discover they are second cousins."
  
I made a BIG mistake. I added boys. Oey Vey!

When I turned Draft #4 over to Rebecca in the fall of 2015, she wrote a great--but difficult editorial letter. You can read her feedback here

I dug in. Re-outlined. Took out the boys and several historically correct settings that I LOVED but which, took away from the story. Sent it to Rebecca. Got her approval! 

Draft #5 was born January, 2015.  

Besides saying goodbye to each girl's love interest, I gave the girls more opportunities to connect with each other and I stayed faithful to my current pitch:

"In 1950, two teenagers discover family ties that intertwine like deep roots under their city's sidewalk. One girl is black. The other is white."

For the last four months (in between moving out of an apartment, more road trips than I care to count, and teaching a writing class) I've been in a different type of revision mode. I had a draft that I liked, but following Kathy Erskine's advice at Highlights Summer Camp, I needed to cut to the chase in each chapter and needed to show, not tell in each scene. 
With Kathy Erskine at Highlights Camp

I worked hard and then printed out 320 pages. Only to discover the manuscript was 94,600 words--14,600 over my target of 80,000 words (which is the high end for a young adult novel). 

I began to hunt and destroy. 


Working at home, in hotels, and libraries,
I had  my laptop, my pages, and pink post-its.
If I found a story thread I wasn't sure I'd completed,
I stuck a note inside the lid of my travel companion:
an Adidas shoebox.
Having a deadline helped. Several of my beta readers wanted to read it during winter break. Holing up in a NC condo without a 9-hole golf course nearby also helped.

Chocolate, caffeine, and watching the "deleted words" add up helped too. 


After combing through the manuscript and following Janice Hardy's advice about revision and editing, I killed:
141- "Just"
106- "about"
36- "I think"
34- "I wonder"
34- "start"
15- "almost"
11- "nod"
 8-  "I shrug"
I discovered that my writing was stronger without qualifiers. 

All together, I expunged 11,146 words. That means I still have 3,454 words to delete. I'm counting on my beta readers to help me continue this tightening process. I haven't searched for "but," "and," or "that." There's probably a few hundred more useless words which may kick the dust!

While I'm waiting to receive feedback from my beta readers, I'm tackling the Author's Notes, Bibliography, and creating a spreadsheet on agents. 

I'm hopeful and excited. 

Stay tuned!







Thursday, September 16, 2010

Oh the Places You'll Go!

You may associate the title of this blog with the popular Dr. Seuss book of that name. But in this case, I’m referring to the places that an author such as myself goes to in order to research historical fiction. On Tuesday, that meant going to the celebration of the United House of Prayer’s 84th convocation in Charlotte, NC. It also meant eating delicious food and listening to trombone bands, vocal choirs, and brass choirs as they played for 200 appreciative fans.


What is my connection to a gospel shout?


For those who are new to this blog, I am writing an historical middle grade novel which takes place in Charlotte in 1950. The main plot is about how a 13-year-old-white girl and a 14-year-old-light-skinned African American girl discover that they are second cousins. In the process of researching the story I have read books, interviewed scores of people, and tried to capture life in Myers Park and Cherry—the neighborhoods in which my main characters lived.


One of the stories I heard was about the annual Daddy Grace parade that wound itself through Brooklyn, a neighborhood torn down in urban renewal during the 1960’s. Thinking that could be an intersecting point for my characters, I’ve researched Daddy Grace and his influence in the African American community. Although the original House of Prayer for all People which he founded in the 1930’s was razed, a new building now draws hundreds of people to its location in North Charlotte. When I found out that the Levine Museum was hosting a concert there, I suspected I would find a detail or two that would find its way into my book.


I was not disappointed.


Since pictures are worth a thousand words, videos must be worth several thousand each. Here is a sampling of what I saw and heard.


Here is Felton Weather, first lead trombonist:


 


And the rest of the Clouds of Heaven band:





The youngest musicians:



Jaydon Caldwell, age 6, plays along with his Daddy, a trombonist
I listened to the music and wished the trombonists would parade through the auditorium in the same way that 60 years ago, musicians wound their way through Brooklyn. (Click here and then click on Brooklyn for a video from 1959.) I understood how crowds gathered and how people were drawn to Daddy Grace.


 Members of the United House of Prayer Bailey String Praise band and choir.
Photo by T.ORTEGA GAINES, Charlotte Observer
How will attending this event inform my story? I gained three words: pulse, rhythm, and throb. I am richer as a novelist, for having heard, and felt, this Charlotte musical tradition.

THE NIGHT WAR: A MG Historical Novel Review

  By now you should have received an email from my new website about my review of THE NIGHT WAR by Kimberly Brubaker Bradley. (It'll com...