Orchards: A Review and a Giveaway

This is a two-for-one week as I review and give away two books on the theme of bullying which Joyce Hostetter and I tackle in the spring issue of Talking Story.

From the number of novels-in-verse that I review, you may guess this is a genre close to my heart. Ever since I was in high school and poured my heart out in free verse, I've admired this genre. But there is more than a world apart from my attempts and beautifully written novels such as THE GOOD BRAIDER, BLUE BIRDS, CRAZY, THE KISS OF BROKEN GLASS. I am consistently impressed with these authors' ability to tell well-plotted stories using succinct, figurative language.

Let's add ORCHARDS by Holly Thompson to this list.  

(Please note that the line spacing in the following excerpts are not an exact replica of the book's poems. I had difficulty formatting these poems for this blog.)

Half-Japanese, half-Jewish American, Kana Goldberg is sent to her mother's ancestral home in Japan for the summer. A bullied eighth grade classmate (Ruth) committed suicide at the end of the school year and although Kenna wasn't the bully, she didn't stop it from happening. Working in her mother's ancestral mikan orange grove, she deals with her anger, guilt and grief and comes home a stronger young woman.

because of you, Ruth
I'm exiled
to my maternal grandmother, Baachan,  

to the ancestors at the altar 

and to Uncle, Aunt and cousins 

I haven't seen in three years-- 

not since our last trip back 

for Jiichan's funeral 

when Baachan  

told my sister Emi 

she was just right 

but told me I was fat 

should eat

less fill myself eighty percent 

no more each meal

                    but then I was small
                    then I didn't have hips
                    then was before this bottom inherited from my father's 

Russian Jewish mother  (p.9)

Initially, Kana experiences problems fitting in.

I try to learn fast 

make up for my 

non-Japanese half 

but Uncle makes  

remarks like after I set the breakfast table-- 

how are we supposed to eat... 

with our hands?

I rush to set out chopsticks...  

seconds  

too late

they seem to think 

I can just switch

          one half of me
       on and leave the other 
       half of me 
       off but I'm like
       warm water
       pouring from a faucet
       the hot
       and cold
       both flowing
       as one (p. 24-5)

In Japanese school, Kana tries to reach out to a girl she perceives is an outsider, because that's what her school counselor had said she and her friends should have done for Ruth. 

but instead of opening up to me 

instead of warming to me 

instead of reaching out 

in return
she pivots 

and walks away.
after that 

not everyone is so eager 

to get to know this New Yorker not everyone so hot 

to try their English 

I don't care 

groups don't matter 

so much to me now 

maybe because I know 

most atoms aren't as stable

as they seem (p. 53-54)

She has a negative opinion of her deceased grandfather, but when she realizes he was operating out of his own hurt over her mother's leaving Japan, she recognizes there are two sides to every story.

I think 

there must be at least 

two sides 

to your story, too, Ruth,
and maybe knowing 

more of Lisa's side

          how she lived 
       with her godparents
       not her parents
       who were I don't know where
       might help explain
       why she was so mean to you

       and why we all 
       followed 
       her lead (p.96)

When school ends Kana works long days in the family orchard. There she thinks about Ruth:

everyone knows 

Lisa didn't mean it 

everyone knows 

when a person says certain things 

they don't mean the words 

they say 

really

in the note you left 

for your parents

         and brother
      you said
      life was too hard
      they could never know
      what it was like
      for you at school
      where you were ostracized                           
                                 left out                           
                                 despised

and where 

just that day 

in front of all us girls 

after Jake handed you 

a piece of paper 

Lisa had given you 

a look  

and said 

I hope you die

I saw you glare  

at Lisa 

hard, I thought 

mean, I thought 

bitch we all said

hurt, I now realize 

as you crumpled that note into a  

tiny ball that was still 

in your jeans pocket

         when you were found in Osgood's orchard (p.110-111)

Kana's grief doesn't stop there; her world continues to painfully unravel. But by the time she returns to New York she has found a new home with her mother's family and a new way to go on living. 





Joyce Hostetter and I are giving away this book in conjunction with Talking Story's current issue on bullying. You can leave a comment either here, or through the newsletter. Do both, and your name will be entered twice. 

Guardian: A Book Review and a Writing Exercise

Congratulations to Sheri Levy who won Dorothy Price's picture book, "Nana's Favorite Things."

In November I reviewed Mississippi Trial, 1955  and analyzed a scene using questions that Rebecca Petruck posed to me. In this post I'm sharing an excerpt from another award winning book about the Jim Crow period, Guardian by Julius Lester. This time I'm analyzing it using questions from James Scott Bell's book, Plot and Structure.

A short but immensely powerful book, Guardian portrays a lynching as seen from the viewpoint of several characters most intimately effected by the man's murder. Here are seven of these characters:

Ansel Anderson- a 14-year-old white boy living in a small town in the south in 1946.

Bert Anderson- Ansel's father who operates Anderson General Store and helped Big Willie get his job.

Maureen Anderson- Ansel's mother.

Little Willie Benton- Ansel's black fishing buddy who works with Ansel at the General Store. 

Big Willie Benton- WWII vet suffering from (undiagnosed PTSD), Little Willie's father. He does odd jobs at Mary Susan's father's church. 

Mary Susan Dennis- the girl Ansel likes.

Zach Davis- Ansel's antagonist and town bully. Great-Grandson of the man who founded the town of Davis, son of the man who owns the largest plantation in the town as well as the store where Ansel's father works and the church where Mary Susan's father is the preacher. 

Through these multitude of lenses, yet told from the narrator's present tense viewpoint, Mr. Lester has interwoven a story full of deep prejudice and misunderstanding. It is an unconventional style which works well for this topic. The reader intimately sees each character's motivations, fears, and beliefs and feels his or her emotions.

James Scott Bell writes: "A novel usually revolves around a few big scenes. These act like guideposts as the novelist moves from one to the other up through the climax." (p.127) The scene you are about to read happens three-quarters of the way into the book and is one of the big scenes in Guardian. Bert and Ansel have just left their store. 

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As father and son cross the street to the car, they see Big Willie hurrying out the front door of the church. He looks quickly to his right and left, and seeing Bert and Ansel, he runs to them. 

"Mistah Bert, suh! I'm glad it's you. Yes, suh!" Willie is a tall and rather ungainly young man. His face looks as if it absorbed every death he witnessed, those he was agent of and those he was not. He is wearing a khaki military shirt with a private's stripe on the sleeve. But the shirt is dirty and torn, as if he has not taken it off since his discharge. 

"Wasn't me, Mistah Bert. No, suh! I didn't have nothing to do with it, but I know I'm gon' get blamed for it. Something like this happen, nigger gets blamed every time. Yes, suh. Sho' do. But I ain't done it." 

"What are you talking about, Willie?" 

Willie points toward the church. "I seen him. I seen him just as sho' as I'm seeing you and Mistah Ansel. Yes, such. The young Mistah Zeph." 

Bert hurries to the church and goes inside. In the dim light at the front, he sees and does not want to believe what he sees. 

"Ansel! Go outside!" 

Instead of doing what his father tells him, Ansel says, "Papa? What's he doing?" 

Zeph Davis the Third turns at the sounds of the voices. In his right hand is a knife. It is slick with blood. On the floor in front of the alter lies a body, the skirt raised to reveal her nakedness. 

Ansel does not wait for an answer from his father, who is still trying to understand what he is seeing. Ansel screams, "Mary Susan! Mary Susan!" and runs to the front of the church. He stops and stares at her nakedness. Then, realizing what he is doing, he pulls down the skirt to cover her. 

In doing so, he sees a ripped blouse and severed bra. The exposed breasts are red and slick with blood.  

He wants to stare, but feels that he shouldn't, that Mary Susan would not want him to. 

He takes the blood-soaked blouse and pulls both sides over her bared breasts, careful not to touch them. 

Zeph looks rapidly from Ansel to Bert, back and forth, back and forth, breathing heavily, not knowing what to do, what to say. 

Then he sees Big Willie in the shadows at the back of the church.

"He did it!" Zeph hours, pointing at Big Willie. "He did it!" 

"Mistah Bert? Suh, look at me. Ain't no blood nowhere on me. Look at him. He covered with blood, her blood." 

"You know niggers, Bert!" Zeph breaks in. "They do all kinds of stuff with roots. That nigger probably got a mojo that can take blood off his hands." 

"I seen him, Mistah Bert. I seen him. I was up in the balcony. I likes to sit up there when no one's around. It's real peaceful. 

"That's where I was when the preacher's girl, Miz Mary, come in. I wanted to leave right then 'cause I knowed it wouldn't look good if I was alone in the same place with a white woman. But wasn't no way I could get out without her hearing. Seeing' me, she might get the wrong idea and start screaming. So I just stayed still. 

"She went to the altar and knelt down to pray. I wondered what could be weighing so heaving on the heart of someone as young as she was. If she'd been a nigger gal, I could understand. Us niggers need all the prayer we can get. Yes, suh. 

"Miz Mary hadn't been there long when I heard the door of the church open and he come in. I thought maybe the two of them had decided to meet up together at the church, but when she turned around to see who it was had come in and seen it was him she say, 'What do you want? You get on outta here and leave me alone. I'm praying.' 

"He don't pay no mind to what she say. He go up to her and grab her try to kiss her. She push him away. She say, 'Get away from me or I'll kick you so hard you won't be able to move for a month.' 

"That's when he whipped out his knife and before she could do anything, he was on her, stabbing her over and over. Then I seen him raise up her skirt, and I didn't want to see no more. Mistah Zeph was so caught up in what he was doing that he didn't see me, and I hurried out and that's when I seen you and your boy. That's the God's truth, Mistah Bert. You believe me, don't you? You'll tell the white folks it wasn't me. Won't you Mistah Berth?" 

"Who you going to belive, Bert? A nigger or a white man?" 

Zeph notices that Bert is hesitating, that Bert is thinking about what the right thing to do is, and Zeph drops the knife on the floor next to Mary Susan's body, runs up the aisle and out of the church. 

"Rape! Rape! Pastor's daughter been raped by a nigger!" Zeph is running and yelling at the same time. Over and over he shouts and the only words that are clear are "rape" and "nigger." pp. 71-75.

********

Mr. Bell asks:

Was this an action scene? No question. This scene demonstrates high intensity with "tremendous conflict, important emotions, sharp dialogue, and inner turmoil." (Bell, p.128)

Identify the places where you learn about the character's objective in the scene and the conflict:

• Big Willie's speech when he meets Ansel and Bert show how he wants his name cleared. That is repeated  at the close of the scene bookending his desperation. Conflict roars to life through Zeph's false accusation. 
• Entering the church, Ansel wants to see what has disturbed his father. His internal conflict in seeing Mary Susan is demonstrated in his actions.
• Zeph's anger at being rebuffed again (this is not the first time Mary Susan rejects him) leads to his objective: revenge. His conflict is visible in his brief hesitation after his sociopathic behavior. 
• Bert wants not to see what is plain before his eyes. Afterwards, he also hesitates, showing his internal conflict. 

How does the scene end?

Zeph leaves the church and "Over and over he shouts and the only words that are clear are 'rape' and 'nigger.' The reader knows that this certainly means disaster for Big Willie and sets up the scenes which, like soldiers falling in battle, will surely follow. 

Do you want to read on? 

I'm going to leave this question up to you. Even though you have a strong sense of what's going to happen next, are you pulled into the next scene? Why or why not?

Jim Bell writes, "...you need to end scenes with a prompt, something to make readers turn the page...Don't ever let your scenes fizzle out, ending on a boring note." (p. 124).

It seems to me, that Julius Lester has done just that. 
On next week's blog, Mr. Lester shares some personal insights into writing Guardian.

*********

For more information on making your scenes intense, download these handouts from Lorin Oberweger, founder of Free Expressions. 

Scene Response Sheet

High Temperature Plotting Sheet

You Heard it Here First: Introducing Dorothy Price's Debut Picture Book and a Giveaway

Congratulations to Clara Clark for winning Sandra Warren's book, WE BOUGHT A WWII BOMBER.

*******

As many of you know, one of the things I enjoy about blogging is sharing other author's news. This week I am happy to introduce Dorothy Price who endeavored to break into the picture book market for years. I first met Dorothy when I led the Charlotte, NC SCBWI critique group and read this book in its infancy. I am delighted to have Dorothy tell us about her very personal path to publication.

CAROL: What was the genesis of NANA'S FAVORITE THINGS? Was there a particular event in your life that led you to writing about a grandmother with diabetes? 

DOROTHY: The story began in 2011 when my 7-year-old daughter, Sanai, helped my mother bake her famous pumpkin and zucchini breads. As the first grandchild, she and my mom formed a strong bond over cooking and baking. 

Sanai Price with her grandmother, Annie Henderson

CAROL: How many drafts did you go through before you submitted NANA'S FAVORITE THINGS? What was that process like? 

DOROTHY: There were too many drafts to count! I learned that a story isn't as strong as it can be unless you have multiple drafts. I brought the story to my SCBWI critique group and from there, it went through several rounds of edits. After each critique group meeting, I felt like it was getting stronger, but none of the agents I submitted it to offered representation. By the end of 2012, after my last round of submissions, I put it away and moved on to writing something new. 

CAROL: Speaking of SCBWI, how has it been a part of your journey to be a published writer? 

DOROTHY: I always say I didn't really become a kidlit writer until I joined the SCBWI in 2010. I began writing kidlit in December 2008 after a traumatic experience, but the stories I wrote between 2008-2010 were created before I learned the picture book writing craft. Nancy Krulik is responsible for my joining the SCBWI. It was at her South County Library author visit in October of 2010, amidst a host of children, that I waddled over to her (I was 7 months pregnant with my son) and asked what advice she had for aspiring writers. She immediately said ... "Join the SCBWI!" I am forever grateful to her for that advice. I would love to meet her again and tell her, thank you!

CAROL: I love that story, Dorothy! On another track, do you have an agent?

DOROTHY: Not yet, but I do have an agent who expressed interest in another completed picture book. I submitted to her in September 2015, and she responded in December, but still no contract. 

CAROL: How did you find Eifrig Publishing? How many publishers did you query before you found them? 

DOROTHY: I only submitted NANA'S FAVORITE THINGS to a few publishers. I found Eifrig on Twitter after following kidlit, picture book, and other literary hastags from authors, agents, and publishers. Those hashtags lead me to Penny Eifrig, the owner of Eifrig Publishing. (Click here for submission information.)

CAROL: Did your editor ask for any changes? 

DOROTHY: Yes! I submitted to Penny in the spring of 2013. I didn't hear back from her until October 2013. She had a few suggestions for how to make Sasha's character stronger by having her come up with more ways to help her nana. Of course I brought the story back to my SCBWI critique group for advice, and submitted the revised version back to Penny in December 2013. I heard back from her in January 2014 and she explained that her list was full, but she was still interested in the story. I didn't hear back from her again until April 2014 when she said she wanted to move forward with publishing the book!

CAROL: How long did it take from initial concept to publication? 

DOROTHY: Roughly five years. 

CAROL: What are your hopes for this book? 

DOROTHY: Since this book is based on personal experience, my hope is that it begins to create a dialogue about diabetes in all communities. A number of my close family members have died from diabetes complications, so I have seen firsthand how devastating this disease can be. My mom actually has diabetes, but because of her lifestyle changes, she does not take insulin. She exercises and maintains healthy eating habits which has contributed to her stable health. I would like people to know that diabetes is a preventable disease, if you're willing to make some lifestyle changes. 

CAROL: What’s next? 

DOROTHY: My book launches on February 8, 2016. My first book signing is at Park Road Books on February 20 in Charlotte, NC. 

Overall, I am extremely grateful for Penny Eifrig and TeMika Grooms who illustrated the book. The journey was long, but well worth it! 

Dorothy is wife to one, mother to two, and writer of picture books. Of all her grownup jobs, teaching high school English was her favorite. Aside from jumping rope, running, and spending time with her family, reading books is one of her  favorite things to do!

"Sasha loves to shoot hoops and ride her bike. Those are her favorite things to do. But she also enjoys her Nana’s yummy treats. One day, Sasha learns her Nana has diabetes and can no longer eat the tasty snacks they have baked together over the years. With quick thinking, Sasha comes up with a clever plan to help her Nana become more active and healthy. Before long, Sasha and Nana realize they both have some new favorite things."

To enter for a chance to win this engaging and informative picture book, please leave a comment by 6 PM on Thursday, January 28. If you're new to this blog, please leave your email address also. Share this on social media (and tell me in the comment) and I'll enter your name twice. 

A Handful of Stars: A Review and Audio Book Giveaway!

I think I can honestly say that I've never read a Cynthia Lord book that I haven't enjoyed. From her picture books about a wild and wacky hamster, to her sensitive middle grade book Rules about an autistic boy and his family, Ms. Lord has a way of telling stories that entertain, teach, and delight readers of all ages. 

So, when I had the opportunity to review an audio book for Recorded Books and A Handful of Stars was one of the selections, I jumped at the chance.  

I wonder if elementary or middle grade teachers asked their students who the protagonist of this story is, who would they choose? Would they pick Tiger Lily, who has lived with her French Canadian grandparents in a small town in Maine ever since her mother's death when she was a young girl? Young readers might (correctly!) identify that Lily's desire to save her beloved dog Lucky's eyesight is a central problem; the conflicts which Lily faces over her dog and being the right kind of friend makes her the protagonist. 

Or would they pick Salma, a migrant farm worker in town to pick blueberries for the summer with her family, who not only shows Lily a truth she didn't want to see about Lucky, but also teaches her about art, courage, and what it means to work hard to follow your dreams? 

Then again, I can imagine a spunky fourth grader volunteering that the true protagonist is Lucky. Because if he hadn't run away from Lily, she might never have met Salma. He was responsible for bringing the two girls together in an unlikely, but special friendship that is central to this story. 

There you go. Now that you have some teasers, here are a few favorite parts:

In order to save money for Lucky's eye operation, Lily sells painted bee houses in her grandparents' store. She stencils on three different patterns and carefully paints each one to realistically resemble blueberries, leaves, or flowers. When Salma volunteers to help, she thinks outside the stencils. Her blueberries are pink or purple and the results shock Lily. When Salma says she loves art because there are different ways of looking at the world and there are no wrong answers, Lily's thinking is challenged.

Proof of the pudding is when Lily goes outside her normal way of painting a bee house and decides to paint a Tiger Lily (first wondering if it a flower or a weed) without using a stencil. When she is done, she admits it's not perfect, but signs her name anyway. This time she created art. 

Another favorite plot point is the empathy Lily develops when she learns that her mother, a French Canadian, struggled to feel as if she belonged in the little Maine town. Understanding her mother's history enables Lily to see the obstacles facing Salma as she competes in the local Blueberry Queen pageant. 

Finally, she remembers her grandfather's advice to be brave and passes it along to Salma at the pageant: "To do brave things you don't have to be hugely brave. You just have to be a bit braver than you are scared," is so delicious that I have to include it here too.

This would make a great holiday gift for a young girl in your life (ages 8 and up.) I am giving away the audio CD through this issue of Talking Story. Leave a comment here for one chance to win; leave a comment through the newsletter and I'll enter your name twice. Contest is up December 7 so enter now! And make sure you leave your email address if I don't already have it.