Marking a Milestone

Last week I pressed send.

Not to an agent or an editor. 

But to 10 beta readers. 

I finally have a draft of Half-Truths, which is ready to be critiqued!

Eight years ago Joyce Hostetter challenged me to join her in NaNoWriMo. I'd been thinking about writing a novel and had a rough idea what it was going to be about, but unlike my student Sydney Kirsch, I was unprepared. 

Undaunted, I plunged in. Eventually what I wrote in November, 2008 turned into Draft #1 of Half-Truths. It was from Kate's POV and I thought it was terrific.

I wrote slowly back then. Labored over word choices.  Experimented with tenses and had A LOT of false starts as I couldn't figure out where to begin the story. I edited as I went. Did I say slowly? I finished that draft on New Year's Eve 2010. I spent the next eight months honing and perfecting and thought it was "done." (How naive could I have been?)

I attended the 2011 SCBWI-Carolinas conference and was blown away. My work was critiqued by Mary Cate Castellani who suggested I write the novel from two points of view. Re-vision began and Draft #2 was born.

My first attempt at outlining chapters
from alternating POV. Index cards circle
my dining room table.

During that time I read books about the experience of being bi-racial, books about Charlotte, and interviewed experts. For more on these books and my interviews click on the Half-Truths tab. 

One of my favorite experts. Price Davis, constantly reminded me to make my story authentic.
He's standing in front of his childhood home in Cherry, NC where my character, Lillie lives.
Price passed away in December, 2016. 

The second draft turned out to be my kitchen sink draft. I wanted to put in everything that I found. How African American funeral homes used hearses for ambulances because the white ambulances wouldn't transport blacks. The poor care blacks received at Good Samaritan Hospital. Police brutality. The one drop rule. 

I sent Rebecca Petruck that draft in July, 2013. (The scene I shared in that blog post is still in my story, but stronger.) 

After receiving Rebecca's editorial input, Draft #3 was conceived in August, 2013. I worked on character arcs, rearranged plot points, and eliminated some of the extraneous events. 

Draft #4 deepened the characters. But I strayed from my pitch which, I had written in 2012: 

"In Charlotte in 1950, two teenage girls--one black and one white-- break racial restrictions, uncover family secrets, and discover they are second cousins."
  
I made a BIG mistake. I added boys. Oey Vey!

When I turned Draft #4 over to Rebecca in the fall of 2015, she wrote a great--but difficult editorial letter. You can read her feedback here. 

I dug in. Re-outlined. Took out the boys and several historically correct settings that I LOVED but which, took away from the story. Sent it to Rebecca. Got her approval! 

Draft #5 was born January, 2015.  

Besides saying goodbye to each girl's love interest, I gave the girls more opportunities to connect with each other and I stayed faithful to my current pitch:

"In 1950, two teenagers discover family ties that intertwine like deep roots under their city's sidewalk. One girl is black. The other is white."

For the last four months (in between moving out of an apartment, more road trips than I care to count, and teaching a writing class) I've been in a different type of revision mode. I had a draft that I liked, but following Kathy Erskine's advice at Highlights Summer Camp, I needed to cut to the chase in each chapter and needed to show, not tell in each scene. 

With Kathy Erskine at Highlights Camp

I worked hard and then printed out 320 pages. Only to discover the manuscript was 94,600 words--14,600 over my target of 80,000 words (which is the high end for a young adult novel). 

I began to hunt and destroy. 

Working at home, in hotels, and libraries,
I had  my laptop, my pages, and pink post-its.
If I found a story thread I wasn't sure I'd completed,
I stuck a note inside the lid of my travel companion:
an Adidas shoebox.

Having a deadline helped. Several of my beta readers wanted to read it during winter break. Holing up in a NC condo without a 9-hole golf course nearby also helped.

Chocolate, caffeine, and watching the "deleted words" add up helped too. 

After combing through the manuscript and following Janice Hardy's advice about revision and editing, I killed:

141- "Just"
106- "about"
36- "I think"
34- "I wonder"
34- "start"
15- "almost"
11- "nod"
 8-  "I shrug"

I discovered that my writing was stronger without qualifiers. 

All together, I expunged 11,146 words. That means I still have 3,454 words to delete. I'm counting on my beta readers to help me continue this tightening process. I haven't searched for "but," "and," or "that." There's probably a few hundred more useless words which may kick the dust!

While I'm waiting to receive feedback from my beta readers, I'm tackling the Author's Notes, Bibliography, and creating a spreadsheet on agents. 

I'm hopeful and excited. 

Stay tuned!

A Lover of Words: Sydney Kirsch, NaNoWriMo Teen--Part II

Some of you will remember my interview with one of my writing students, Sydney Kirsch, which I posted at the beginning of November. Please welcome her back for Part II.

Carol: How did you fit NaNoWriMo into your homeschool curriculum?

Sydney: Being in high school, I do have a lot of work to do on a regular basis. Fitting in NaNo isn’t always the easiest thing, but I’ve developed a sort of method.  Generally, I start my school year in June or July, so that gives me plenty of time to work ahead in most subjects. That way I’m able to really focus on NaNo when November comes around. Other than writing, my parents only require me to keep up with math during November.  Being able to work at my own pace really is an incredible advantage, and I’m so thankful that I’m in a position where I can.

Carol: Any crazy habits that you developed or kept you going during NaNo?

Sydney: My favorite habit, or tradition, is preparing for Nano with crazy amounts of “Nano Food,”  which includes basically all of my favorite snacks and teas.

Carol: What was the best part of NaNo? The worst?

Sydney: For me, the best part is something every writer can relate to at some point or other. Those moments when the words just seem to be flowing from my brain. That’s my favorite. When I love my characters, when I think my plot makes sense, when chasing ideas with a net of words doesn’t seem so impossible after all. Those are the moments that make NaNo so worth it. 

The worst part? Probably two things. Middles and back pain. 

I feel like whenever I’m writing the middle of a story it’s really just a chain of muddled gibberish that just wanders around without pulling the story in the direction it needs to go. Of course, It’s my own fault that those moments happen, but they’re still discouraging. 

Also, sitting for an entire month isn’t exactly ideal for spinal health. Pretty painful.

Carol: What helped you to get to the finish line?

Sydney: I’m extremely competitive. During the first days of NaNo, a friend of mine challenged me to beat him to 50K. All I’m going to say about it is that you can’t declare war on me and expect no reaction. I accepted the challenge. So, with some spurring on by friends, I wrote and wrote and wrote until I thought my brain was reduced to a sizzling pile of cells inside my skull. That’s what pushed me to the finish line so soon, really.

Carol: What did you learn? 

Sydney: I learned (or relearned) a lot of things. I learned that world building is hard. Endings are hard. Words are hard. Being a writer is one-quarter sleep deprivation, one-quarter edited outlines, four-ninths will power, and just a smidge of having your head in the clouds.

Carol: Tell us about your process. Did you end up gushing? Revise as you went? Did you have any readers as you went along?

Sydney Well, it turns out something unexpected happened. I completed a first draft in around 52,000 words. I didn’t revise as I went and I didn’t word spew. I just wrote. The key was, first, not having a ridiculously detailed outline, but also trying to give my writing direction. Using every word to pull the story along. 

It didn’t always work. Sometimes I found that I had backed myself into a corner and realize I’d wasted 1500 words on a scene I didn’t need. But for the most part, it just hashed itself out. (Though I will have to flesh it out later, of course.)

As for readers, I guard my first drafts with my life. Though I did enjoy randomly sending some of my friends lines from my story. And I kind of dropped giving them any kind of context. It never failed to make me laugh.

Carol: Did your story go off in different directions than you had expected?

Sydney: Oh, yes. Plot points I thought were going to just be small snitches turned out to be the foundation of my story. Characters I thought were going to play big roles just sort of tagged along and will probably not survive the second draft. 

Carol: Can you tell us any more about your story?

Sydney: Turns out this story is a little bit like Narnia gone entirely wrong. Ancient royalty (supposedly) returns, political jealousies being dug up with them. Plus there’s a unicorn involved.

Also, I finally named it. Until We’re Broken. 

Carol: Final word count? Plans for revision? Hopes for publication?

Sydney: Final word count is 52,156. After I got to the end of my outline, I had planned to go back and “add scenes” I thought were needed throughout the story. But then I realized I just wasn’t admitting to myself I wanted to start rewriting and editing. Calling it something else doesn’t change the fact that editing is editing. So I made myself stop and wait a while before slashing away at my manuscript.

I have another idea or two brewing for stories, so my plan (as of right now) is to let Until We’re Broken rest while I slave away at my other projects. Or… mull them over for a while. Then I plan to come back to my NaNo story and hack away at a second draft.

As for publication, I don’t know. I think we all have that little (or big) corner of our hearts where we stick our novels and with them a few scraps of unrealistic hopes. Yes, I’d love to be published. Can I? And a novel? Probably not. But maybe someday I’ll try.

Carol: What’s next?

Sydney: Well, first, Geometry. I’m trying to finish it before the end of the year (a friend challenged me in this, actually :)) so I’ll probably spend a lot of time working at that. But I also have a couple of story ideas I’ll be thinking over. If I like them enough, I’ll probably write them. This year’s NaNo has reminded me how much I adore writing stories. How I love the precision of it. The imagination of it. And how much I love words. So, I’m going to keep working at it. I’ll never get better if I don’t try.

Sydney's organized writing space. Mine should look so clean!

Carol: My guess is that you're going to keep getting better and better. I look forward to buying your book one day!

Sydney: 😊

Meet Liz Rice: Highlights Foundation Groupie Extraordinaire!

Today please welcome Liz Rice who shares some of her experiences at Highlights Foundation workshops and links to their scholarship applications. Hurry! The deadline is December 15!

Carol asked me to write about the Highlights Foundation Workshops. She says I’m like their groupie. Which in many ways I am! I have attended six of their workshops and gone to their campus for my own self-created Unworkshops, many times. This year I attended their Summer Camp where I met Carol, and two Artists-in-Residency programs.

The first workshop I attended was, "It’s All About Character" in November of 2009. Since then I’ve attended at least one per year. What makes these workshops and Unworkshops so special, besides the delicious food, the wonderful pre-dinner wine and appetizers, the cabins [which are wonderful cozy rooms with refrigerators and coffee makers], and being in the Poconos. . .  It’s that compared to a writing conference, the Highlights Foundation has set up these opportunities to give you an immersion in your specific work in progress and an immersion in the writing process. Plus, you’re with a generous and very helpful faculty.

Liz and Jerry Spinelli

I attended the Eileen and Jerry Spinelli Artists-in-Residency in September. I learned so much from listening to Eileen and Jerry Spinelli. Eileen helped me stay focused on one project, while still carving out a little time to explore new picture book ideas as they pop up. She suggested I devote an hour in the morning to playing with the new idea, so I don’t lose its flicker. And then  I should return to my work in progress to keep moving ahead to completion. I’ve been doing that ever since. From participating in discussions during lunch, I learned from Jerry to give yourself permission to stop working on a manuscript if you feel it isn’t working and instead, put your focus on an idea you’ve been pondering.

I enjoyed that Residency so much that as soon as I arrived home, I registered for the Suzanne Bloom Artist-in-Residency, and attended it two weeks later. A groupie would do that, right? There were two author-illustrators, a few illustrators, and me--the only writer. Great opportunity to learn about picture books from the illustrator’s perspective, how they tell their part of the story and also enhance what the author has written.

Liz and Suzanne Bloom

The Artist-in-Residency is an Unworkshop with perks! For the same price as an Unworkshop, you have the opportunity to gain insights and get feedback on you works in progress. The authors and artists will work on their upcoming books or illustrations in between mealtimes. Then during meals, artists and attendees share their processes, frustrations, experiences and answering questions. 

The Artists-in-Residents of 2016 have been honored with scholarships in their name. They will be helping to identify, review and award the recipients of those scholarships. 

The application deadline is December 15^th for the Eileen Spinelli, Jerry Spinelli, Suzanne Bloom and Meg Medina 2017 scholarships. Recipients are selected on two criteria: seriousness of purpose and financial need.

This link gives you more information about those scholarships. Scroll down for links to the Spinellis’ and Meg Medina scholarships.

https://www.highlightsfoundation.org/6881/announcing-the-2017-suzanne-bloom-scholarship-for-artists/

Speaking of the Artist in Residency program, check out the 2017 list of honorees.

https://www.highlightsfoundation.org/6897/2017-artists-in-residency-honorees/

Get a cup of your favorite beverage and enjoy exploring everything on the Highlights Foundation website. Make sure you sign up to get emails on upcoming workshops.

http://www.highlightsfoundation.org/

The Experience link is a bit of a tour with testimonials:

I hope to see you at one of the Workshops or Unworkshops in 2017!

Liz Rice is the author of  Aranya Tries Again (Ladybug Magazine) and BILL RICHARDSON (Mason Crest Publishers). Before devoting time primarily to writing, she taught preschool to 4^th grade for 22 years. 

Find her on:

https://www.facebook.com/Lizricewrites/

http://lizricewrites.com/

Blog - http://lizricewrites.com/this-writers-journey-down-a-novel-path/

The Lions of Little Rock: A Review

Congratulations to Joyce Hostetter who won LONGBOW GIRL from last week's blog. I had promised you would hear the results of Sydney Kirsch's NaNoWriMo experience. But in typical "I-want-it-to-be-better" mode, Sydney wasn't quite satisfied with her guest post and is continuing to tweak it. Stay tuned, you'll read it soon!

*****

As many of you know, when you're pitching your manuscript to an agent or editor, you're supposed to find comp titles you can compare your work to. Although I read a lot of young adult and middle grade historical fiction, I hadn't found a comp title for Half-Truths.

Until I read The Lions of Little Rock (Penguin, 2012) by Kristin Levine and found these similarities:

• A friendship between a white girl and a black girl in a time and place when it was unacceptable.  
• A story that takes place on the eve of civil rights. 
• A story in which the black girl is light-skinned and passes. 
• A story of courage and change. 

Of course there are significant differences. The Lions of Little Rock takes place eight years after Half-Truths is set in 1950. Those were eight years when a lot happened in the battle for civil rights. In the historic Brown case in 1954, the Court unanimously ruled that "separate but equal" public schools for blacks and whites were unconstitutional. Practices didn't change immediately.  But in 1957, amidst physical and verbal abuse, nine black students integrated schools in Little Rock, Arkansas.

The year afterwards, both black and white schools were closed as Arkansas Governor Orval Faubus attempted to prevent integration. The Lions of Little Rock is a fictionalized account of that year. 

Here are some scenes I particularly appreciated. 

Marlee, a quiet girl who loves math and has a hard time speaking to anyone besides her family, becomes friends with Liz. Her new friend is light-skinned and Marlee doesn't realize she's a Negro until Liz doesn't come to school one day and the other students reveal her race. 

After school, Marlee asks Betty Jean, their cook:

"Have you ever heard of a light-skinned Negro pretending to be white?" 
Betty Jean stopped what she was doing, her hands full of chicken guts, and gave me a funny look. "Why are you asking that, Marlee?"
The kids at schools said...this girl I know... I was just wondering...I couldn't get any words to come.  Finally, I just stood there, helpless, praying Betty Jean would understand.
I guess she did, because she finally pushed the basting pan aside and went to the sink to wash her hands. She cut two pieces of blueberry pie, then sat down at the table. I sat down too, and she pushed the pie across the table to me.
"It's called passing," she said. "Some Negroes who are really light-skinned and have straight hair try it." 
"Why?" I asked.
"Better schooling. More opportunities." She shrugged. "Maybe they're just tired of being seen as second best."
I didn't say anything. It suddenly seemed like there was more gray around her temples than had been there just a moment before.
"It's a hard life," Betty Jean went on. "You have to give up seeing family and friends. Stop going the places you used to go. And you have to lie--every day--to everyone you meet."
Like Liz had done to me.
"Lying like that, well, it's exhausting. I hope you never have a secret like that Marlee. A secret so big, your whole life depends on it." (p. 68)

For the first time, Marlee begins to see the hatred and prejudice in her city. Marlee's sister, who has been out of school for a month because her school can't open, gets sent away to live with their Grandmother. At a time when she's just beginning to speak what's on her mind, Marlee feels abandoned by her sister and Liz. When her father is angered that the town votes against integration he says, "We are not just a town of racists, but those of us who believe in integration..." He shook his head. "We can't seem to find our voice." (p. 75)

Despite their parents' warnings for them not to see each other, the girls find secret meeting places. Marlee initiates these meetings because of her genuine affection for Liz and the reader senses that in the process, Marlee is learning, growing, and gaining her voice. 

When Liz can't meet her one day because she has to take her little brother to the movies, Marlee has to make a choice.

I knew the Gem was over on West Ninth Street. If I could go to a Negro church, why not a Negro movie theater? I turned the idea over and over in my mind, like a lemon drop on my tongue. I imagined being the only white girl in a room full of Negroes and shivered. It was a little scary. But Liz had been the only colored girl in a whole school full of white kids. Negroes might not be welcome at the white theater, but I didn't think there was a rule against whites going to the Negro theater. If she could do it, so could I. (p. 106)

As Marlee grows in empathy for Liz, she also realizes she's changing. "For so long I'd been the quiet girl. If I wasn't her anymore, who was I?" (p. 113)  Marlee also begins to see that what has worked for her (doing math problems in her head when she's upset) isn't going to work for Liz who loves words more than numbers. A part of Marlee's growth is helping Liz figure out a way to control her temper by writing things down. Seeing how her friend is different than her, takes Marlee beyond their racial differences.

When of my favorite parts is close to the end of the book. The school board members which blocked integration were voted off the board, paving the way for new members and school integration. But Marlee is still upset at school the next day. This is a scene with her Algebra teacher, Mr. Harding. (Who by the way, is an important secondary character.)

"I'm happy we won," I said. "So how come I don't feel better?" 

He looked thoughtful and said nothing for a long moment, then he pulled out a pencil and started to write on the blank piece of paper I had before me. "I think what's happened, Marlee, is that you've realized the world isn't an addition problem." 

He wrote 3 + 4 = 7 down on the paper. "We tell kids that sometimes. We pretend the world is straightforward, simple, easy. You do this, you get that. You're a good person and try your best, and nothing bad will happen." 

"But the truth is, the world is much more like an algebraic equation. With variables and changes, complicated and messy. Sometimes there's more than one answer, and sometimes there is none. Sometimes we don't even know how to solve the problem." (p.270)

I wish I could say that the book ends with a beautiful tying-up-all-the-pieces between Marlee and Liz. But because of circumstances beyond their control, it doesn't. Like Mr. Harding's lesson, books don't always come out the way we want them to. But it is a realistic, hopeful ending that shows how much Marlee has grown. And there is hope for the future--which is vital when writing a book for young people.

Although the two main characters are girls, boys play significant roles in the book. I hope that teachers in upper elementary and middle school use The Lions of Little Rock when they teach civil rights; it will make this time period come alive. 

Longbow Girl: A Review and Audio CD Giveaway

Congratulations to Myra Dunlap who won an autographed copy of AIM from last week's blog.

*****

Some books defy genres. Longbow Girl is one of them. It is well-researched historical fiction and also a meticulously crafted, time travel novel. No easy feat, but one that Linda Davies pulls off with aplomb. If you study this beautiful cover, you'll get a clue as to what this amazingly-plotted tale is about.

Longbow Girl, which takes place in Wales, spans twenty-one generations (or for those of you who are math-challenged like myself, 500 years.)

Fifteen-year-old Merry Owens is descended from a long line of longbow warriors. But she is unique: she is the first girl to master the bow. The opening chapters set up Merry's stubborn, smart, and loyal personality as well as her problem: unable to pay his bank debt, her father may have to sell their family land to their wealthy neighbors. This estate just happens to belong to her best friend--James DeCourcy's--parents, the Earl and Countess DeCourcy. The young people do not condone the rivalry between their families that spans generations, and instead, champion each other's dreams. 

Merry will do anything to keep the land in her family. But how? Her dilemma is compounded when she finds an extremely rare and valuable copy of the Mabinogion, a collection of eleven stories collated from medieval Welsh manuscripts. While it is in her possession her life is threatened and she considers how to get rid of it to protect herself and her family. 

The book speaks of a treasure near a waterfall in a riddle pool.  Risk-taker that she is, Merry follows the book's directions in order to try and find the treasure which could save her family from financial ruin. Her decision is full of high stakes danger as Merry finds a watery tunnel (later she names it the river of time) which brings her to a land that looks vaguely familiar. The land is filled with people that look like her family and the DeCourcys. Gradually, she realizes that she has traveled "500 years from home." When she discovers that her ancestor has been falsely imprisoned, she has no choice but to try and rescue him and save her family's legacy. If he dies, she reasons, she may never have been born! 

Linda Davies next to Maen Lila, the Neolithic standing stone that guides Merry.

This action-packed story is full of Merry's and James' gut-wrenching choices which hook the reader. Merry's survival and longbow skills are tested; James' physical prowess and ability to deceive his captors are tried; and both young people prove that their friendship can not only withstand immense challenges--but grows stronger as a result. 

The novel is full of high action adventure, but Davies does not neglect to show both characters' internal struggles. Although writers are instructed to "show, not tell," Davies names feelings such as anger and relief. To be honest, that never bothered me. But there were some loose ends which I wondered about. What happens to their antagonist, the evil professor who follows Merry back through the tunnel. Does he get trapped in the time of the Tudors? Similarly, a wild stallion follows Merry into the 21st century. Why doesn't her father question his sudden appearance? 

Since I listened to the audio version, this review is not as full of quotes as most of my book reviews are. But I jotted down this memorable line. Merry is facing capture and possible death and she thinks, "The 16th century was not a playground for the privileged children of the 21st."

At first, I was a little put off by Emily Wilden's Welsh accent. But fairly quickly I adjusted to her manner of speaking and when I finished listening to the performance, her voice stayed in my head for days. Ms. Wilden annunciated her words well and helped the reader form an emotional connection to the characters. Since I listen to audio books in the car, I often couldn't wait to be driving somewhere to hear what happened next to Merry or James. Listen to this excerpt and you will get a taste of Ms. Wilden's reading of Chapter 2. You will see how it adds authenticity to this Welsh tale.

Here is Ms. Davies' trailer:

This book will make a wonderful gift to a teen reader who likes fantasy--but make sure you listen to it yourself first! To enter this giveaway, leave me a comment on my blog by December 1. PLEASE leave me your email address if you are new to this blog. Continental U.S. mailing addresses only. 

********

Here is the NaNoWriMo update from teen writer,  Sydney Kirsch. As of midnight on November 26 she had written 51,692 words. She said, "I've spent most of the week outlining scenes I still need to write in the middle and end of my story which has been so much fun. But I'm prepared to get it done now, and and I think my first draft will actually be complete by the end of the month!"

Next week Sydney will share more about her work and what she learned in NaNoWriMo 2016.

Teaching Fiction, Using AIM as a Mentor Text, and a Giveaway!

As I mentioned two weeks ago, I recently completed teaching an eight-week class in writing fiction. I knew Joyce Hostetter's recent book, AIM, would appeal to both boys and girls and chose it as a mentor text for the class. Here are a few more reasons--from the perspective of my teen students--why you should read this book or purchase it for your favorite young reader. 

Using the worksheets linked below, we brainstormed a fictional character and put him in a setting. We thought about his internal and external goals, potential conflicts, and the various directions his story could go. The quotes from AIM are ones the students selected to demonstrate each story component. 

CHARACTER

Create a Character Information Bank

Create an Imaginary Character

Sydney K. chose this passage because she liked the key details which were included about Granddaddy: 

Grandaddy's gray hair was flat on one side from sleeping on it. I nudged his leg with my knee. "I brung your supper."

"Thunderation! You fool. You woke me up." His eyelids slid shut again, and his mouth fell open like a trapdoor without a hook. A dried stream of tobacco snuff ran from the corner of his mouth and down onto his neck. p. 15

Alex M. commented that he was interested in how Junior's two aunts were portrayed:

"So there I was, with a piece of fudge in each hand, watching her and Aunt Lucille tiptoeing around each other. I tried to imagine them with Pop, playing together when they were all young'uns. But those two women eyeing each other didn't seem like the kind of people who could have been small and childlike once upon a time. For one thing, they are both tall. And big-boned. Right now, Aunt Lucille's face was more serious than Miss Hinkle's in the middle of a handwriting session. Lillian was smiling, but I could tell she was all pretend--just tying to buy something with that fudge of hers. p. 133-4 

After a discussion about the difference between internal and external goals, the class decided that Junior's external goal was to help his mother and his internal goal was to gain respect. 

SETTING

Create an Imaginary World

Set the Scene: Create a Setting Information Bank

Students discussed how this line of dialogue from Junior's mother portrayed setting and character:

"After your granny died, Homer would sit on the neighbors' porches day in an day out, sniffing their cooking and inviting himself for dinner." p. 42

We talked about how settings need to be sensory and one of my students picked this section. It's a good example of using setting to show a character's conflicts:

I peeked through the small holly tree, and not far away was Ann Fay with Leroy. He had a finger over his lips, reminding her to be quiet. I could see they had their eyes on my squirrel! 

The crunchy sound of their feet on the dry leaves took me way back, to when I was eight years old. And their white breath clouds in the cool air--it was like being there again, in the woods with Pop, learning to shoot squirrel for the first time. p. 59 

CONFLICT

Plan-A-Problem

In this selection we talked about the conflicts that were going on in the outside world (the beginning of WWII), the problems between Junior and Dudley, and the conflict between Junior and his teacher, Miss Hinkle. Grace W. wondered if Miss Hinkle was Junior's antagonist. 

"Sit down, Junior." She said it real low, but there was something in her voice that told me I better listen. Or else.

So I sat. But inside I was standing up. Inside I was marching to the back of the room and jerking that Dudley Catfish Walker up and showing him what a Democrat could do to a Republican. If he wanted a fight, I was a mind to let him have it. 

Miss Hinkle tried to bring the discussion back to the economy and how, if we did got to war, we'd have to sacrifice on more luxuries here at home. That didn't help because Dudley and opinions on that too, and I spoke out and said his ideas were stupid so maybe he should just dry up, and Dudley said I was dumber than a box of rocks. p. 86

Another student selected this section showing Junior's internal conflict over Dudley's suggestion they "borrow" Miss Hinkle's car:

Dudley shook his head. "Just think about it," he said. "We won't be stealing because we're bringing it back. After all that woman has put us through, don't you think she owes us a little something?"

"There's nothing to think about," I said. And I meant it, too.

But after he left, I couldn't stop thinking about it. What a confounded stupid idea! I thought about it when I was doing odd jobs at the sawmill and when I was planting cotton for a farmer near the crossroads. p. 209-210 

When we talked about the concept of antagonists, we considered why Dudley acted the way he did. The students readily agreed that the abuse he suffered as a child laid the groundwork for his anger and bullying.  

*********

WHAT I LEARNED FROM AIM

Selected quotes from my students: 

"I learned that enemies can sometimes become friends." ~Grace W.

"Well-sketched and memorable characters don't have to be complicated. Mrs. Hostetter did a great job of portraying characters in just the right setting and characteristic dialogue; simply and effectively showing, not telling, their personalities." ~Olivia R. 

Look closely for some items from AIM!

"AIM taught me that people are molded into who they are by their life experiences. That each and every part of our lives makes us who we are." ~Abigail R.

"AIM gave me a great model in which to observe the elements that we studied and practiced in class.  I was able to see great examples of what the class as a whole is trying to teach us in terms of characterization, plot development, power words, writing tight, how to handle history and so forth.  Where as before I would have read the book and thought "what a nice book, interesting story."  Now I could really appreciate the craftmanship and all the work that went into making such an enjoyable story come to life.  I can really see how difficult good writing can be." -Kelila M.

"I thought AIM was a good picture to show that whatever habits we develop and tolerate now, can be passed down for generations. Junior was affected by his father who in turn, fought a lot with his mean father." - Caleb R.

For your last chance to win an autographed ARC of AIM from my blog, leave me a comment by Friday, November 25. Please leave me your email address if you are new to this blog. Share this post on social media or become a new follower and I'll enter your name twice. Make sure to tell me what you do.

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At 9:30 PM  on November 19, Sydney Kirsch, our teen NaNoWriMo scribe wrote: "At this point, I am wondering how to word. I mean write. Write words. Also, how do resolutions work?"

Here's a favorite line: "... I just need someone who can read a map. I stumbled through the bedroom, hobbling on my good foot. And a horse. Hopping through the mountains wasn't exactly on my bucket list." 

Word count: 49,477.

¡Hola! Let's Learn Spanish: A Review

Judy Martialay has a passion for languages.  Specifically, she has a passion to teach children from ages 6-10 that learning Spanish is fun and rewarding.

¡HOLA!, Martialay’s first book, includes a fun story written in English with key words in Spanish, a song, a skit, background information about the cultural context, an art activity, and a dictionary.  The material is supplemented by an audio version which parents and educators can download online. Simple, colorful illustrations by the author amplify the content and engage readers in the story. The combination of these activities makes this an attractive classroom or homeschool book.

When I received my review copy, I first thought I’d pass the book along to my daughter, Lisa Edgar, who teaches middle and high school Spanish. I envisioned she would eventually use it to introduce Eleanor, my youngest granddaughter, to Spanish. 

But when my seven-year-old granddaughter, Caitlin Kasten, announced she loved Spanish, I thought ¡HOLA! might supplement her introduction to the language. 

Caitlin is reading above her second grade level so I let her try reading the book herself. Unfortunately, that was frustrating since she’s only just begun to learn Spanish. She enjoyed listening to me read (although Lisa later told me my accent was awful), was disappointed that there wasn’t a second story in the book, and wanted to make the mask. Her four-year-old sister was drawn in by the illustrations and listened attentively while we waited to be served at a favorite restaurant. 

Libbie and Caitlin enjoyed the story of Panchito, the Mexican jumping bean. 

After showing the book to Libbie and Caitlin, I next asked Lisa for her impressions. She said it would be a cool book for students at the elementary school level. She liked how the reader was introduced to the meanings of different vocabulary words and how Spanish words replaced the English in the text and was bolded to further capture the student's attention. “The repetition of Spanish helps a child remember the words. The multiple opportunities for kids to see words in context is also good,” Lisa said.  As a teacher, she thought that using words found at home or in the supermarket was attractive. 

Eleanor listening to ¡HOLA! for the first time.

I finally decided that the book is making it’s first home with Caitlin. I asked her to share it with her Spanish teacher and I'm sure she'll soon learn to read the story on her own. ¡HOLA! will get passed down to Libbie and  since it is part of the Cousins Club collection, it’ll eventually be back in Eleanor’s hands. 

And who knows? If her mommy starts talking Spanish to her soon, she’ll be reading it to her grandmother one day—with a better accent than I can ever manage!

Judy is working on a book to introduce children to French, BONJOUR! LET'S LEARN FRENCH, featuring Louis l'escargot, France's favorite snail. Like ¡HOLA! it will include a story, activities, culture, song, and craft: How to make an impressionist style painting/picture. She also hopes to publish similiar books in Chinese, Arabic, and Italian. 

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Sydney Kirsch, last week's blog guest, agreed to keep us posted on the progress of her NaNoWriMo book. Here is her conclusion from last week:

"Awful writing can be fixed... nonexistent writing can't."

Word count as of 12:08 AM November 13, 2016: 30,091.