TEARS TO PRINCESS: A Review of "Tears of A Princess" by Guest Blogger, Mara Scudder

Tears of a Princess by Laura Thomas is the upper middle-grade sequel to the novel Tears to Dancing. It follows the main character’s best friend, Natasha, as she deals with the news of her parent's divorce and accompanies Bethany on a mission trip to Mexico that changes her perspective forever.

Although some elements of the novel were written better than the first book, there were still two persisting drawbacks. The first was the characters, all of which were one or two-dimensional. Even Natasha, who we were supposedly watching transform from a spoiled rich girl to a selfless and caring Christian, had most of her character development done throughout the year gap between the end of the first book and the start of the second. While the girl in the first book was careless, narcissistic, and vapid, in the second book Natasha has much more substance, dealing with a few emotional outbursts, which she quickly apologizes for. I was looking forward to watching the dramatic change, but instead it seemed as though she had already accomplished most of the change without God.

Another drawback was the dialogue. Rather than letting readers discover what a character was feeling and how they were changing, the author used exposition for the characters to communicate to each other. While their thoughts were more abstract and natural, their dialogue was blunt, no-nonsense, and to the point, even during very emotional scenes. This made it difficult to read, especially in scenes that were supposed to be the most powerful.

One thing that I appreciated about this work was the overarching themes that were missing from the first. Both tears, the sunrise, and the idea of Natasha being a “princess” were echoed throughout the work. Natasha’s transformation from being her father’s “princess” as a term of indulging endearment to thinking of herself as being a princess as the daughter of the King of kings had a special impact because of its intentionality. Tying in tears as her way of breaking her family’s picture-perfect facade and becoming more honest with people around her also enhanced the continuity of the work and made the resolution much more conclusive than it would have been otherwise.

Aside from this, the plot was also more coherent, allowing a more natural flow between events than the first book, and the overarching themes made the ending far more complete and satisfying. This ending made the ideas it had to offer much more impactful, creating a stronger lead-up to the trilogy’s finale, Tears, Fears, and Fame.

Hi! My name is Mara, and I’m a Christian artist, violinist, and blogger. I remember the day that I decided that I would learn something new about what makes a good story from every book I picked up — whether it was good, bad, or a mixture of both. I use my blog as a way of sharing some of the tips and tricks I’ve learned and highlighting which books, cartoons, and movies have taught me the most about writing an awesome story. I’m in eleventh grade and live in Philadelphia.  

Check out Greg Pattridge's Marvelous Middle-Grade Monday blog 

for more book recommendations.

TEARS TO DANCING: A Middle Grade Review by Guest Reviewer Mara Scudder

REVIEW

Tears to Dancing (Dancing Bear Publishing: 2012) by Laura Thomas is an intimate book tracing one young ballerina’s struggle with losing both her parents and her ability to dance in a traumatic car crash. The protagonist, Bethany, takes center stage in this character-driven novel. Few outside forces (aside from the car crash) affected the protagonist or much of the cast at all. Instead, the author explored their inner dialogue and struggle with grief through slow-paced, intimate chapters that echo character-centered classics.

One of the biggest drawbacks of the work was the fact that it opened with the death of Bethany’s parents. As a result, it was difficult to mourn with or even understand what she had lost throughout most of the novel. The first time the readers heard of her parents was when they learned that they had died, and this made it more difficult to relate to Bethany’s grief, which was the biggest element of the work.

Another issue I found was that several of the characters played the strawman -- Bethany’s best friend is very much the one-dimensional “rich girl” cliche, while her “church friend” is a teenager with a heart of gold. This was a detriment to the dialogue, as well as Bethany’s relationships.

Aside from that, there were definitely some very heartwarming scenes and powerful themes that came from the protagonist’s discovery of the gospel. Although it was certainly not perfect, the work had some powerful ideas to share. Bethany developed dramatically over the work, and I am looking forward to reading the next two parts of the trilogy.

GUEST BLOGGER

Hi! My name is Mara, and I’m a Christian artist, violinist, and blogger. I remember the day that I decided that I would learn something new about what makes a good story from every book I picked up — whether it was good, bad, or a mixture of both. I use my blog as a way of sharing some of the tips and tricks I’ve learned and highlighting which books, cartoons, and movies have taught me the most about writing an awesome story. I’m in tenth grade and live in Philadelphia.  

The Button Girl: An Interview with Author Sally Apokedak and Autographed Giveaway Part II

 Last week I reviewed Sally Apokedak's young adult fantasy, The Button Girl. This week, I'm happy to provide an interview with her about the story behind writing this thought-provoking novel for Christians, non-Christians, young women and adults.

INTERVIEW

CAROL: How did you come up with the ideas for this book?  

SALLY: I had a hippy friend who had named her children things like: Glory Ofgod, Selah Praise, Faith Alone, and so on and so forth. And then my pastor told me that Naomi's two sons were named Disease and Famine. And that gave me the idea to set up a society where people are named for what God is doing in the lives of the moms. 

 

My daughter had just become a teenager and I wanted to write a book that would help girls see something I did not know as a girl--there is a big difference between lust and love. Kevin DeYoung said in one of his sermons that men want to see porn and women want to BE porn. But I think that most women don't really want to BE porn. They want to be loved and, when they are young, they don't understand that lust does not equate with love.  

 

So I painted a very bad villain and a very good hero. They are so black and white that they may seem almost cartoonish. But they were painted that way with intent—to show that lust is selfish and love is selfless. 

 

But many things are not as black and white as lust and love are. The world is messy. There are a few gray areas and there is a lot of foggy thinking. 

 

People are complex. So in the book the tutor was rightly opposed to slavery, but for the wrong reasons. The king was not opposed to slavery, but he was a more honorable man than the tutor.  

 

So I set up a book full of contrasts with a mountain and valley, and with slaves and masters, and with fog and sunshine. I wanted to show the difference between not only lust and love but also to examine contentment and apathy and idealism and integrity. Does civil disobedience mean we are complaining against God? I looked at my own life to find places where I struggled to know how to obey God. In the end, Repentance is very much a picture of my sixteen-year-old self.   

 

 

CAROL: How long did it percolate before it became a book?  

SALLY: I started in 2006. Wrote about five chapters and then ran out of story. I didn't write any more on it, because  . . . writing novels is hard work. And I struggle with rough drafts. 

 

Life happened. My husband died of cancer. I took care of my mother and my father after that. My dad died. 

 

I finished the book in 2009, so the book took four years to write from conception to completion. But actual writing time was probably five months.  

 

I burned through three agents and got a few offers from smallish houses, which we turned down. And in the end, I published the book myself in 2017. So eleven years from conception to publication.  

 

CAROL: How much did your faith affect writing it? 
 

SALLY: God was uppermost in my mind as I wrote. 

 

Sober is a type of Christ in his love for Repentance—in the way her sin cost him and in the way he still loved her—and in his substitution of himself for Comfort.  

 

But I have always wanted to write a character who is a type of God the Father. I’ve wanted to show the sacrifice that the Father made when he ordained that his Son would die. God the Father gave up the One he loved most to save a sinful rebellious people who set themselves up as his enemies, so I had a character make that same sacrifice. 

 

But mostly, I wanted to write a book that would make girls think about a few things. Is there a God who created us? Is there a God who allows slavery? If God allows slavery—or any sin—without striking the sinner dead, does it follow that he is in favor of the sinners/slaveholders? Is such a God unfair? 

 

I left up in the air who was saved and who was not. I ended the book with Repentance coming to see Providence was blessing her, whereas in the beginning of the book she felt cursed. But I didn't go farther than that because her world is not our world and people there aren't saved the same way people here are saved. 

 

Providence was not meant to look too much like our God. The god in the book was a simple metaphor that showed one aspect of our God. He was the provider—and he was more than a clockmaker who wound up the clock and ignored it. He was a god who cared about Repentance and was working things together for her good. But he was not a god who sent his son to die for sinners. This book was not meant to lead people to Christ. It was meant to make them ask: Is there a God? Do the unfair circumstances in this world prove there is no loving God watching over us? And if we wait long enough, will we see that everything will, indeed, come out right in the end?  

GIVEAWAY

Leave a comment if you would like to be entered into the giveaway. If you left a comment last week, then you will be entered twice. A winner will be chosen on July 2. Continental U.S. addresses only. PLEASE leave me your email address if you are new to my blog. 

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Sally is an author, agent, and speaker. You can find out more about Apokedak Literary Agency on her website. 

Two years ago I was fortunate to attend a
writer's retreat led by Sally.

ONE WEEK OF YOU- by Lisa Kline's new YA novel and a Giveaway!

Congratulations to Jo Lynn Worden and Julian Daventry who won copies of DRIVE from last week's blog post. 

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I am always honored when an author asks me to host their cover reveal. So, when Lisa Williams Kline asked if I was interested, of course I said yes! Her latest book, ONE WEEK OF YOU, (Blue Crow Publishing, February 2019) stars 15-year-old Lizzy who has to carry a flour baby for a week for her health class. During that time there are three prank fire drills and evacuations at school. In just one week, Lizzy realizes that adulthood brings complicated responsibilities. 

AUTHOR INTERVIEW

Lisa Williams Kline

Here Lisa shares some of the backstory of the book. 

CAROL: What prompted the story idea?

LISA: This story is fictionalized from two different real events. One year in high school my daughter had to carry a bag of flour for a week in her health class called a “flour baby.” I thought this was an interesting way to address human sexuality that had some comic potential. 

The second event took place several years later when there was a week in which there were three bomb threats in my other daughter’s high school. I was interested in the way the students handled that week. When I started writing this story, I thought, what if there were scary disruptions to the school schedule during the same week the kids had to carry the flour babies. I was partly interested in combining a somewhat comic story thread with one that wasn’t comic at all, and that has been one of the challenges in writing this story. It’s also a story of a first crush, and I based that on a combination of a couple of high school crushes of my own. And I have always been a forgetful person, and I incorporated that character flaw into my main character Lizzy. 

CAROL: Did you interview or research the book in anyway? If so, who did you talk to and how did you research it?

LISA: Yes, for example, part of my story involves student hacking of the school computer system, and I interviewed an IT expert on how the students could do this hacking. I also interviewed a teacher about school evacuations. I also had some teens read it and give me feedback about the voice. 

CAROL: I understand that you put aside the manuscript for awhile and then came back to it. Had the story changed in your mind in the interim? If so, how?

LISA: The story has evolved quite a bit over the time that I have been working on it. I put it away when I was working on the Sisters in All Seasons series. When I took it back out, I thought, hey, I think I can work on this again, there are some good moments here. Various editors and agents have all had suggestions for changes, and the story is quite a bit different than it was starting out. 

CAROL: What is the message you hope your readers will take away?

LISA: I wasn’t really thinking about a message when I wrote this book. I just wanted to tell a story that I hoped would be engaging. Many of my books end up being coming of age stories, and I think this one is too. I guess if there’s any message it would be to be kind to everyone. 

CAROL: Can you share some of your path to publication for ONE WEEK of YOU? 

LISA: While I’ve had an agent in the past, I do not have an agent now. I sent the manuscript directly to the editors at Blue Crow Publishing. www.bluecrowpublishing.com 

I queried Blue Crow Publishing and in a few weeks they asked for the manuscript. Lauren Faulkenberry wrote me about six weeks later, after she’d read it, with a revision request. In that revision, she wanted me to mostly ramp up the tension more and make a change to the ending. I worked on that revision for a little more than a month, sent it back, and after a few weeks she send me a publication offer. I was absolutely thrilled!

Lauren and Katie at Blue Crow have been wonderful to work with. After I signed the contract, Lauren wrote me an editorial letter in which she asked for more changes, such as fleshing out the setting more and describing the characters more fully. I also did another round of revisions for Katie. Blue Crow is an indie press, and the personal attention has been fantastic. I really feel as though Lauren and Katie were one hundred percent behind me and my book. So far it’s been a great experience. 

CAROL: Thanks for sharing all of that, Lisa. It's great to hear of an indie press that's working hard for its authors! And now for the moment you've all been waiting for (unless you cheated and scrolled down)--here is the lovely cover for Lisa's new book!

GIVEAWAY

Leave your name (and email address if I don't have it) to enter the giveaway of an eARC for ONE WEEK OF YOU. Enter soon! Giveaway ends October 18!

Just Fly Away: An Audio CD Review and Giveaway

Congratulations to Connie Saunders who won THE WOLF'S BOY.

Please note that since this is a review of an audio CD, the following quotes might not be exactly correct; I did my best to capture the words.

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REVIEW

What do you do if you find out that your father had an affair eight years ago and you have a half-brother you never knew about?

That is fifteen-year-old Lucy Willows' problem and the crux of JUST FLY AWAY (Algonquin, 2017), the debut YA book by actor Andrew McCarthy. When her father discloses the information to her and her sister Julie, Lucy is furious. How could her mother continue living with him? How can anything ever be normal again? How could he have lied to them--pretending they were a perfectly regular family--all this time? Lucy begins a quest to find her brother Thomas. In her suburban New Jersey town this proves to be pretty easy--he lives within biking distance of her home. 

Soon after Lucy finds out about Thomas, she "falls in love" with her best friend's brother, Simon. In Save-the-Cat language, Simon provides the B-story; the love interest who supposedly provides some nuggets of truth. To be honest, as a secondary character, Simon fell flat for me. Although Lucy is crazy about the way he looks and how he kisses, until the end of the book Simon doesn't do a whole lot to warrants her effusive affection. When Lucy tells Simon how angry she is about Thomas, Simon remarks, "It's not his fault you know." True, but not an earth shattering revelation. 

In my opinion, the book bogs down in the middle. There were too many scenes that didn't show more than two teenagers smoking dope and kissing. I kept waiting for more to happen. The book became more interesting when Lucy impulsively decides to run away from home and take a bus to her grandfather's house in Maine; although I wasn't convinced that this type of impulsive behavior was built into her character. In fact, it's not until she happens to see a poster of Maine that she makes this decision and throughout the journey shows little emotional reaction to leaving home. The bus ride had some interesting moments but felt drawn out. 

I love generational stories so I found Lucy's interaction with her grandfather to be the best part of the book. As they walk along the rocks near the coast, Lucy dares to ask him why he is estranged from his son. His answers helps her to understand that her grandfather wrongly took his anger out on her father. Her grandfather remarks, "We see them [people] the way we see them. Other people may see them a different way...We never see our parents as just people. They're our parents. And that ought to be enough for them. But it's not enough."

The walk along the breakwater is the most suspenseful part of the book. Although the walk ends in tragedy, it ultimately leads to more risk-taking and honesty between Lucy and her father. 

In the car back in New Jersey, Lucy asks her father, 

“I guess you can never really know everything about a person, can you?”  

"The best we can try and do is let another person know who we truly are. To let them see us. That is, if we love them and trust them enough. And to do that, we have to reveal ourselves to the other person.” 

Her father admits that he covered up the affair because he didn't want to be seen in a bad light. Lucy babysits for Thomas and while at their house picks up a book that had been her favorite as a child. In it a Japanese farmer wisely looks at several different events from both a positive and negative point of view. At which point Lucy concludes that maybe it's not so bad having a little brother after all- a satisfying ending.

GIVEAWAY

This book could be used as a conversation starter for a teen who has gone through an event such as this or is just having trouble talking with her parent.

I am giving away the audio CD, courtesy of Recorded Books. Leave me a comment by July 28 to be entered in the giveaway. Make sure you leave me your email address if I don't have it.

Cleo Edison Oliver in Persuasion Power: A Review and Giveaway

Cleopatra Edison Oliver is a fifth grade force to be reckoned with. Her superpower is the art of persuasion and she is convinced that she can not only create and market personalized hair clips ("Tell the world who you are!") to every girl in her grade, she's sure that her idol, talk show host, Fortune A. Davies, will endorse her. Following the pervious book, CLEO ADDISON OLIVER: PLAYGROUND MILLIONAIRE, PERSUASION POWER by Sundee T. Frazier (Scholastic Books, 2017) will appeal to 4th-6th grade girls.  

In one of the initial scenes Cleo's teacher, Mr. Boring, rebukes her for not focusing on their language arts lesson. Cleo admits that she can't imagine how metaphors or similes could be useful. Mr. Boring points out she used a metaphor in the ad copy for her passion clips. Like an inside joke, for the rest of the book Sundee Frazer sprinkles flavorful similes and metaphors into Cleo's thoughts and speech. For example, when Cleo thinks about another girl who became quickly popular she thinks, "The girl was all whipped cream and no pudding." 

Although this is a book about how Cleo translates her passion for hair clips into big sales, it is equally about Cleo wanting to find her birth parents. 

Her parents loved her. A lot. And yet lately she'd felt a growing desire to know more about her birth parents. To have a relatives list of her own. To see herself in her family. To have some clues about what she might look like all grownup. (p.73)

The author uses an apt simile to describe Cleo's feelings about her adoption: 

She had her parents. But something else--a gnawing, like hunger, except it wasn't in her stomach--told her that something was missing. She just wanted to know: Did they [her birth parents] remember her, wonder about her too? (p.82)

Cleo comes up with a foolproof plan to find her birth mom. She'll become a "kidpreneur" on Fortune's show, her birth mom will see her and contact her. When her mother warns against getting her hopes up too high, 

Cleo lets the words slide off her like grease on a non-stick pan. She was a seed in dirt, a dog chasing a scent, a dentist with a scaler! Nothing--not even her overly cautious mom--could stop her from trying to reach Fortune. (p.107)

Despite anxiety over meeting her birth father, she tells him, "I'm a girl with big dreams who won't let anything stop her. I may be young, I may be small, but I'm as persistent as the Itsy-Bitsy Spider." Her birth father gets a funny look on his face and she's worried that she said something wrong until he says, "That's exactly how I was when I was your age."

Suddenly, she was flinging her arms around his middle and hugging him as hard as she could. His arms hovered above her, then slowly he embraced her, ...and the feeling of her birth dad's arms around her mingled together and became a memory she would never forget--a coin in the piggy bank of herself that she would never, ever spend. (p. 228)

And even though Cleo never appears on Fortune's television show, the ending leaves the reader with a satisfied smile. I have just two points of critique. As much as I enjoyed this fast-paced contemporary novel, I would have liked if better if Caylee, Cleo's "business partner" was a little more developed and provided more push-back. It seemed as if Caylee was always hard at work creating the passion clips and worried over Cleo taking on more orders than they could manage--but there didn't appear to be consequences of Cleo's choice to turn over the majority of the "manufacturing" to her best friend. Similarly, Cleo spends a lot of class and homework time daydreaming about her business passions without any  consequences to her grades. 

This book will entertain the lower middle grade crowd and I have a paperback copy to give away. (My apologies in advance; the book arrived from the publisher with creases in the cover.) Leave me a comment by May 26 and your email address if you are new to my blog, and I'll enter your name in the giveaway. It would be a great book for your daughter, granddaughter, or to add to your classroom library. 

Wheels of Change: A Review, Autographed Giveaway, and Free Skype Visit!

If a picture is worth a thousand words, then a good title is worth at least as much.

WHEELS OF CHANGE (Creston Books, 2014), Darlene Beck Jacobson’s debut middle grade novel, is exactly what it purports to be: a novel about change. And of course, about wheels. 

The story, based loosely on Jacobson’s grandmother, shows 12-year-old Emily Soper in the middle of personal, family, and societal changes. Set in Washington, D.C. in 1908, WHEELS OF CHANGE is an ideal book for girls who loved the historical American Girl series and are now ready for meatier fare. 

Emily loves everything about her father’s carriage shop: the sounds, smells, and even the “pulsing waves of heat [which] make it feel like summer year round.” (p. 2). The following quote not only shows Emily’s affection, but foreshadows troubles to come:

I stare into the fire’s belly, watching it move and change colors as if it were a living thing. Some folks might think the forge is dark and dreary, with only one small window. But the fire is like a beacon that lights up the whole barn and makes it shimmer. Papa’s barn without the forge would be like Mama’s house without the kitchen. The heart would be gone. (p.2)

In truth, Emily wishes she could be a blacksmith—but of course, that’s not a fitting trade for a young woman in the beginning of the twentieth century.  As a result of her friendship with Henry, the Negro blacksmith who she enjoys watching, she learns first hand about racism and loyalty. 

Whereas impetuous and worry-wart Emily feels more at home in the forge than in her mother's kitchen, her mother has other plans for her. She wants Emily to learn domestic skills including how to host a tea for the neighborhood women. Emily surprises herself by enjoying baking, but the tea proves disastrous when Emily violently disagrees with one of the guests. Without spoiling the book, let's just say that Emily's courage saves the forge when a disgruntled employee, angry over Henry reclaiming his job, attempts to destroy it.   

After the tea, her teacher muses, 

".....Mr. Lincoln must be rolling over in his grave with grief to think that after all these years since the war, people still act this way. The war was supposed to change things." 

There's that word again. Change. Even after a horrible war, people still hold on to their old ideas about folks like Henry. The truth of it makes my insides churn and ache. 

Maybe folks can do without physical changes like cars and electricity. But old ideas about colored people and women should change. They must. (pp.153-4). 

When her father's business starts failing because more people are buying motorcars, she suggests a new idea to her father:

"All this time, we liked everything to be just as it is. But some changes can bring really good things, Papa. Like colored folks living peacefully next to white folks and women getting to vote. What if you changed carriage making into something else?" 

"Like what?" 

"Maybe folks still need other things that horses pull. Wagons, carts, surreys, and coaches." My eyes open wider as more ideas pop into my head. "Baby buggies will never need motors. Sleighs and sleds for winter..." (p. 188-9)

And with that, Emily becomes an agent of change.

Grateful American Book Prize 

Honorable Mention, 2015

I am giving away my autographed hard cover copy of WHEELS OF CHANGE plus curriculum materials. Jacobson has volunteered to provide a SKYPE visit if the winner is an educator; if you prefer you can donate this visit to a school of your choice. If you are a media specialist, teacher, or home school parent, please let me know and I'll enter your name twice. If I don't have your email address make sure you leave it.  Giveaway ends on Saturday, April 8. 

Audacity Jones Steals the Show: Review, ARC Giveaway, and a Mini-Lesson on POV

Congratulations to Sandra Warren for winning Augusta Scattergood's book, MAKING FRIENDS WITH BILLY WONG.

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Here's the question:

On a multiple choice test, which would you choose?

a. Kirby Larson's newest book, Audacity Jones Steals the Show (Scholastic, 2017), is about an eleven-year-old girl ("Audie to her friends") who makes an elephant disappear.

b. Audacity Jones is about Cypher, who in his new job with the Pinkerton Detective Agency, is charged with the duty of keeping an eye on Theo Quinn. 

c. Audacity Jones is about a young scientist, Theo Quinn, who provides Houdini with the necessary illusions to cause a seven-foot elephant to vanish. 

d. Audacity Jones is about Harry Houdini's newest and most fantastic trick ever.  

e. Audacity Jones is about Min; a persistent, smart chocolate-striped puss, who speaks Dog, learns to speak Elephant, and refuses to let her girl out of her sight. 

f. Audacity Jones is about the fraud Oberon who thinks he can use Theo Quinn to outwit Mr. Harry Houdini and become the world's greatest magician in his place. 

g. All of the above.

Third Person Omniscient POV

The answer is probably obvious, but I gave you these glimpses into this story for a reason. Although Audi is the heroine, Kirby Larson uses third person omniscient point-of-view to show readers what these important secondary characters think and want.

The interplay between these characters moves the story forward at a fast pace. Since this device is not seen in too many contemporary books (and generally advised against, particularly for new writers), I asked Kirby what prompted her to write Audacity Jones in this manner. 

She said, "I do not have any fancy names or explanations for the method I used in writing this book. I was aiming for an old-fashioned storytelling feel, thus the moments of omniscient narration; I also chose to break the “fourth wall” by speaking directly to the reader on a few occasions (a nod to Jane Austen). And I do know that we writers of books for children are advised not to use multiple viewpoints, etc., but honestly that is how I felt the story needed to be told. And I am lucky enough that my editor and publisher supported my choice, no matter how many “rules” there are against it!" 

A recent Writer's Digest article, "Why Point of View is So Important" by Joseph Bates, concludes: "Oftentimes we don't really choose a POV for our project; our project chooses a POV for us...Often stories tell us how they should be told--and once you find the right POV for yours, you'll likely realize the story couldn't have been told any other way."

Min's Voice

As I think you'll see from this scene from STEALS THE SHOW, that's exactly what Kirby Larson has done. This is from the POV of Min, one of my favorite characters. In this scene, she has snuck on board a train bound for New York City, for "Where the girl went, so did she." (p. 15)

Despite her abilities and intuitions, Min was stymied by the cargo put aboard at the most recent stop. More cage than crate, it took six men to load it into the baggage car. The creature inside was ten times greater than the heft of both Corgis combined and a thousand times more intelligent than the chickens. Min struggled to interpret the new creature's language, reminiscent of Bison, with a hint of Eagle. It didn't help that the language--or perhaps it was the speaker; Min hadn't worked that out yet--was rather nasal in tone. Min had worked out that the creature was either named Punk or was a punk; at least that's what the men had called it. By its limited vocabulary, she had also surmised it was not full-grown. It smelled of hay and apples and something else: The young thing reeked of sorrow. Once the cage had been situated in the baggage car, that smell did more to keep Min awake than all the clucking of those flibbertigibbet hens.

Early on, Min had learned how to comfort little Audie during lonely nights. Min hesitated: Would this baby, huge as it was, also welcome such comforting? If Punk stepped on her, then farewell to one of Min's remaining lives. Yet, she could not bear the creature's melancholy any longer. She padded close, straw shifting and scratching under her paws, to rub her scent against the metal bars of Punk's crate. After a few moments, the creature slowed it's rocking. Made a snuffling noise. Min waited, not a muscle twitching. Then something stroked her back through the bars. It was Punk's curious appendage, the one that hung from between his eyes. If it was Punk's nose, it was the most ridiculous nose that Mind had ever seen on an animal, but she kept that to herself. Hard enough for this baby to be alone; no need to rub salt in the wound by pointing out how homely he was. But then truthfully, what animal compares to a cat?

"Moww-rr?" Min inquired, paw poised in midair. 

Punk snuffled again. Puffs of warm air from his long appendage blew tracks in Min's chocolate-striped fur. Min took this as permission and eased slowly between the bars, into the cage, a cage too small for Punk to do anything but stand. She pressed against Punk's front leg and he stopped rocking altogether. Then he slowly eased his solid self into a lean agains the metal bars. Min leapt to a spot at the back of Punk's flat head, between ears as big as boat sails. Turning once, twice, three times, she settled herself, purring. Though Punk could not lie down, Min felt him relax.

Min locked at the leathery skin beneath her. It was dry. Punk needed water. Needed rest. Needed...

He said something.

Punk said something. And Min understood.

Thank you, he said. Thank you, friend.  (p.39-41. Used with permission.)

Giveaway and Resources

I have an autographed ARC to send to one of you. If you share this on social media or become a new follower of my blog, I'll enter your name twice. Just be sure to leave me your email address if you are new to my blog and tell me what you have done. Giveaway ends on February 17. Kirby is donating a portion of her royalties to The Elephant Sanctuary.

For other resources on using the third person omniscient POV see:

Third Person Omniscient vs. Third Person Limited  by Nathan Bransford

How to Write in Third Person Omniscient POV by Brian Davis. Brian gives good examples of "head-hopping" (which is NOT what Kirby has done) and subjective vs. objective omniscient. 

Whose Head is it Anyway? by Janice Hardy.

Immersive POV by Donald Maas. Not specifically on third person POV, but excellent article. (Aren't all articles by Maas eye-opening?)  

Twice Betrayed: A Cover Reveal and ARC Giveaway!

I'm honored to share a cover reveal for a tween book that will be released next month. TWICE BETRAYED, by my fellow Highlights Summer Camp participant, Gayle Krause, will be available on March 28th from Trowbridge Books.

Isn't this a gorgeous cover?

Here's the blurb for the book:

The thread of friendship is stretched to the breaking point…

With the spark of independence crackling in Colonial Philadelphia, 

Perdy Rogers chafes under the strict rule of her Quaker grandmother and the endless duties of her apprenticeship in Betsy Ross’s upholstery shop. So when her best friend shares a secret and invites Perdy to help plan an elopement, she’s thrilled to be with her friends again. But Perdy has no idea that one favor will unravel the stable fabric of her life and involve her in a tangled web of deceit, lies and treachery.

Disguised as boys, three girls head to the river to put Perdy’s plan into action, but only two return. When the third, a young milliner’s assistant, is found drowned with gold coins sewn into her hems, coded spy letters in her bodice, and a journal implicating another sewing apprentice as her co-conspirator, all eyes turn to Perdy Rogers. But she’s no spy!

Accused of treason, she struggles to prove her innocence with the help of a handsome stranger and learns the hard way that freedom, whether an individual’s or a country’s, comes at a cost.

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Gayle shares some of the backstory behind TWICE BETRAYED:

I’ve always loved history and discovering how things came to be. In the Caribbean, the long-lost pirates whispered to me with each crash of the waves. I’m working on a female pirate story. When I walked in Pompeii, I felt like I had been there before. In the Coliseum, a new story blossomed, about one of the entertainers. I’ve yet to write that one!

But Perdy’s story was different. I wrote it first, and when I visited the Betsy Ross House, after the story was completed, I froze in my tracks and my husband asked me what was wrong.

But nothing was wrong…it was right. I had described the shop, the kitchen, the bedroom Perdy shared with her sister and grandmother in great detail, with the only difference between TWICE BETRAYED and the real thing being the shape of the stairs. And since the whole story about Betsy Ross making the first flag is a legend, with no real proof that she actually did make it (you can ask any historian) it was a perfect setting for my story.

I come from a long line of seamstresses and am a certified Home Economics teacher so you can see how the sewing bits in the story are relevant.

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TWICE BETRAYED is a mix of fact and fiction stitched together to bring a new light to the fabric of our beginnings, told from the eyes of a thirteen-year-old girl, who fell into a web of deceit and struggled to win her freedom.

Gayle is giving away an autographed ARC to one fortunate winner. Please leave your name and email address (if you are new to my blog.) Random.org and I will pick a winner on February 4. If you share this on social media, let me know what you do and I'll enter your name twice. 

Gayle Krause was born in Scranton, Pennsylvania where she led the younger kids in creative dramatics, wilderness expeditions, and fossil hunting. Those early interactions led her to a career in teaching, where, as a Master teacher she continued to inspire teens as she prepared prospective Elementary Teachers and Early Childhood Educators at the secondary and post-secondary levels. Simultaneously, she directed an instructional Laboratory Pre-K for her students, where she worked with eager young preschoolers.

Turning On a Dime- A Review and a Giveaway!

Time travel. The Civil War. Multi-cultural. Horses. Romance. There aren't many books that fit such a wide variety of categories--but Turning on a Dime by Maggie Dana does just that.

Samantha DeVries' father is Lucas DeVries, a third-generation American of Dutch descent and master horseman; her mother, Gretchen, is an African American and a history buff who has traced her family's lineage back to 1875.

Caroline Chandler is the daughter of a plantation owner in Mississippi who prefers her brother’s riding breeches to petticoats and pantalettes. But in spite of her tomboyish interests, she has lived within the boundaries of privilege and mid-19^th century decorum. Soon after the story begins, Caroline is sent to a neighboring plantation for a dreaded social visit. While there, she learns that her family has fled their farm after Union soldiers commandeered it. 

Samantha (Sam) and Caroline’s worlds intersect when Sam visits her father’s friend’s antebellum home to look at horses. Sam picks up what appears to be a dime from her bedroom floor and falls asleep listening to Lady Gaga on her Iphone.  When she wakes up, Caroline is staring at her and wondering what a slave is doing sleeping in her bed.

Sam gradually convinces Caroline of who she is, although she admits that she doesn’t know how she got there. Caroline is barely prepared for her guest from the future: she has read about a man who travels to the future and sees horseless carriages and flying machines. But she is even less prepared to see a black girl who speaks, acts, and thinks as independently as Sam does. Fortunately, their mutual love for horses helps ease them over their initial discomforts. Or as Sam says, “No matter who you’re talking to, if they love horses you can get beyond whatever barriers you think are out there...” (p. 45)

Told from both girls’ points of view, the reader watches as Sam and Caroline experience slavery’s painful effects. I particularly enjoyed their “ah ha” moments.  When Sam first realizes she must act like a slave in order not to be detected she thinks,

“I am in a nineteenth-century horse barn facing a man with a whip—a mean looking thing with a knotted leather thong—and I can tell he’s dying to use it on me.
“Yes, mister,” I mumble.
He raises the whip. “Go.”
So I shuffle off trying to look as dejected as possible, but inside I am raging with fury. How did my people live like this? (p. 83)

Later, after Sam is mistaken for a runaway slave and is captured, Caroline thinks,

My fists curl into balls. Angry tears stream down my face. All I can think of is Sam huddled on the dirt floor of a slave cabin, being kicked and whipped. Without Papa to curtail him, Zeke Tuner will be brutal. He’ll unleash all his vicious fury on my dearest friend.
How did I not see this before?
Shame joins my angry tears. I’m angry with myself, and I’m ashamed of the world I’ve inhabited all my life without seeing it for what it really is.” (p. 137-8)

The author does a great job of showing the girls overcoming their initial distrust and forming their surprising friendship. In the process, each girl learns about the other girl's seemingly foreign world. Their wit and strengths are tested after Sam is captured; but working together they find a way of escape—and a way for both of them to return to their families. 

Maggie Dana’s love for all things equestrian is neatly woven into the narrative and the plot. Although separated by 150 years, from the moment that Sam asks Caroline,  “What is your horse’s name?”  they have a common bond. From the saddles, tack, to horse quirks and mannerisms, this novel is a great example of an author using what she knows to build a believable, fictional world.

I would recommend this book to girls from 6th-10th grade, as well as to adults who want to use their own life experiences as a springboard into fiction. And while you’re at it, it’s a terrific example of interlacing multiple genres into one novel. Read it. Enjoy it. Learn from it.

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To enter the giveaway for an autographed copy of Turning on A Dime, please leave a comment by 8 AM Friday, August 15. If I don't have your email address, make sure you leave that too. If you post this on your social media of choice or become a new follower to my blog, I'll enter your name twice. Thanks! 

My review of this novel originally appeared on LitChat on August 7, 2014.